New York Times: “Do You Know How Much Your Spouse Makes? Some Couples Are Clueless.”
New York Times, March 2, 2025 — “Many couples are surprisingly unaware about key aspects of each other’s finances — and that can hurt them. Here’s how to get on the same page,” writes reporter Diane Harris in today’s New York Times.
She continues: “Here’s a pop quiz for married couples. Do you know your spouse’s salary? What about the balance of your partner’s 401(k) — and credit card? Bonus points if you can cite how much your husband or wife thinks you need to live comfortably in retirement, or even what age he or she hopes that will happen.
If you’re like most married people, you’re sure you’ll ace this test. Nearly nine in 10 couples say they communicate well with their partner about money, and 94 percent say they are open and transparent with their better half about finances, according to studies released last year by the financial services companies Fidelity and Ameriprise.”
“In reality? Not so much,” Diane explains. She reached out to Marguerita Cheng, CFP® Pro, for insight.
Contributing to the lack of communication and transparency is a desire to keep peace, Cheng believes, noting that more than six in 10 people who admitted to lying to a partner about money said fear of disapproval was a motivating factor, according to the National Endowment for Financial Education survey.
“They may not want to have the conversation because they feel shame or embarrassment or think their spouse will pass judgment,” said Marguerita Cheng, a financial planner in Gaithersburg, Md. “Anticipating conflict sometimes has as much to do with each partner’s prior experiences — say, if their own parents argued a lot about the family’s finances or a former partner constantly criticized their spending habits — as with the present day.”